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Keep a Healthy Love Life, for Life

Intimacy in the bedroom can help a couple feel more committed and content. And research suggests that for older adults, sexual activity is linked to better health.

"Many older adults consider sexual activity to be a natural part of their lives," says Evelyn Minaya, M.D., a gynecologist with Riverview Medical Center. "Yet they may not experience the level of closeness they desire."

Break Out Of The Rut If your bedroom habits have become somewhat stale, talk with your partner about what you might do to spice things up. Try these tips:

  • Tell each other what you like — and don't like. For instance, you might discuss the types of intimacy that you enjoy. "Don't assume you know everything about your partner," advises Dr. Minaya. "Preferences change."


  • If you usually go to bed right after the evening news, take a warm bath before bedtime to relax. Or try cuddling in the morning, when you have more energy, rather than at night.


  • Feeling a little out of practice? There are many tasteful, informative books and other resources for couples that can help you refresh your skills.


  • Try to maintain realistic expectations about your love life. Every couple has times when they are more — and less — in sync. Stresses of life can also influence your libido.

Look At The Big Picture
If you're unhappy with your sex life, examine your partnership as a whole. "Maybe there is another aspect of your relationship that is tense," explains Dr. Minaya. "For example, if you have grown unhappy with your body, it can affect your sexual relationship. Work on building your selfesteem and it may ease the strain."

Perhaps the problem goes beyond the bedroom. Maybe you're upset with how your partner communicates with you. Whatever the issue, acknowledge that it has come between you two. A simple and constructive conversation is a good place to start.

Find Fixes For Physical Problems
As you age, changes in your body can affect your sex life. "It's not uncommon for older adults to feel their sex drive slow down," says Dr. Minaya. "Factors like menopause in women, erectile difficulties in men, medications, and even depression can affect libido."

But there are solutions:

  • A lubricant can help ease the vaginal dryness that some women experience.


  • Adhering to your medication schedule could ward off the long-term side effects of existing conditions.


  • Drinking only in moderation can help you avoid sexual difficulties, such as erection problems, that are caused by too much alcohol.

If you are concerned about your sexual health, don't hesitate to speak with your doctor. He or she can help you identify factors that may contribute to sexual problems and offer solutions.


About The Doctor
Picture Available Minaya, Evelyn, M.D.
Board certified in Gynecology
Tinton Falls, NJ  07701
(732) 530-5550

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